Friday, August 21, 2009

Cold Feet

A lot of people assume that it's much easier to talk to someone online than it is in real life. I have lived by this assumption for years and until recently, would agree that it's true. But ever since I decided that I wanted to be a published author, suddenly it wasn't so easy anymore.

Ever since I learned the word "platform", saying something online has become a stressful event. What if someone important reads it? How does it make me look? Will it hurt my chances at being taken seriously?

I've suddenly become terrified of not only blogging, but of talking to new people I discovered online. Especially successful people who I admire and wish to become friends with in order to learn everything they know.

This blog is born out of that fear, and it almost never existed for the same reason.

It's similar to when you have a new story idea. It's amazing! Everyone will love it! Finally, I have something to say! A fresh new start! But then...what if I can't do it? What if I write it and no one gets it? What if it comes out as childish, mediocre dribble? Or worse, what if it's ignored?

But like writing a novel, I can't let that fear get to me. I'm a writer. If I don't write, I'm nothing.

Of course, I don't have to blog. I just really want to. But what if I'm not good enough? What if no one reads it? What if my message doesn't get across?...etc etc.

I want to create a blog that expresses myself in a professional light. I have something to say, something to offer, and I want you all to receive it. You can't if I'm unfocused, unclear, narcissistic or inconsistent. My fear of coming across like any of those negative traits is why I've decided to start this blog.

My fear of failing is why it took me so long to post this first entry.

But again, like a novel, I can't let fear stop me. I won't. And no one else should either.

And that's all I wanted to say.

Also that this post is dedicated to Divining the Words , a blog by a fellow writer which inspired me to finally suck it up and get my feet wet. His blog is beautiful and full of honest advice for writers. I highly recommend it. So, thanks David ^__^